Brian and i went to the Vandegrift game on Friday night. We took William because it was middle school night and the 7th and 8th grade football players from the two middle school that feed to VHS got to run through the viper tunnel with the varsity players. It's strange to think William may be a viper football player next year! He's done so well in football. It's funny to think we had him in golf lessons when he was you get because we thought him too fragile for contact sports. Now he's our strongest boy and one of the best players at CRMS. Brian and I got up at 4 am to take Margaret, Samuel, and Nick from down the street to VHS to ride the bus to the cross country meet in southwest Austin. Both of us were so tired! We tried to sleep a little in the car at an Einstein Bros. Margaret had another phenomenal race. She has continued to improve her times. I'm so glad we convinced her to stick with XC for this her final year. She's one of our fastest girls, in the top seven varsity. Very impressive for a team that's ranked one of the best in the state. Samuel had a good race as well. He almost let Anthony Monte, the freshman Viper beat him, but turned it on in the final yards and won. He's determined to stay the fastest viper. Vandegrift girls win the meet and our boys placed fifth. We came home and had a pretty unproductive day, at least on my part. Brian repaired the boys' closet shelf and put in the new back deck steps, so his day was productive. I've felt weepy for many days, but it has been a good kind of weepy: a broken, sorrowful for sin kind of weepy, the kind that leads to repentance and renewal. Brian and I went walking tonight and I read to him from my journal from 1999 - 2000. A few excerpts....

 Monday, December 6, 1999

 Exciting news - I may be pregnant! I'm going tomorrow to Dr. Love's office to get a bloodtest.....

Tuesday, December 7, 1999

Today I will find out if I'm pregnant or not. How wonderful it would be to have another child!.....

The results from the pregnancy test were inconclusive. My HCG level was only 6, meaning it is probably very early in the pregnancy. I'll go back in 2 weeks to get another test done. We're excited!

....I am still having trouble believing that I'm once again pregnant! Children are such a blessing!

I have been so emotional lately! Last night I broke down crying. Brian has been very patient with me. I've been meditating on Dueteronomy 6. I've also been crying out for avid to change me as o my He can.

December 23, 1999

It has been several days since I last wrote and so much has happened. I found out that I AM pregnant! I will be six weeks along tomorrow.

Tuesday, December 28, 1999

We are leaving east Texas now and are headed back to Austin. We've been up here since Saturday night. We told Brian's parents about the new baby and I guess they're excited. I had an allergic reaction to the progesterone injections Brian was having to give me, and I broke out in red whelps all over. I had to go to Good Shepherd Hosptial in Longview on Sunday. My doctor wants me to come in today when we get back to Austin.

Saturday, January 1, 2000

It's the new millennium and so far nothing unusual has happened. I guess everyone expected something to. I've been very sick with the flu since last Wednesday. My temperature reached 103.4 at one point. Dr. Love had me to go the emergency room yesterday to get checked out.....

Monday, January 3, 2000

Mama came over today to take care of me. She cooked, cleaned, and watched Margaret. It was such a big help to me!....

Tuesday, January 4, 2000

Today I was feeling some better. I went to my first OBGYN appointment for this pregnancy. I'm 7 weeks and 5 days pregnant and weigh 103 lbs. my pulse and blood pressure were good. Dr. Love gave me an inhaler because I was so wheezy. I did some shopping and then came home and rested....I've been very congested in my chest and feel like I'm drowning.

Sunday, January 9, 2000

Margaret is growing up so fast! She is able to do so many things now, and it's so much fun to watch her! She's adorable, too. She's very petite with tiny hands and feet, and has her daddy's olive skin.
We haven't yet talked about names for the new baby.

January 20, 2000

This morning I spent a lot of time studying Scripture. It was very refining and I felt myself draw near to my Savior. I met Brian for lunch and then ran some errands. Tomorrow I'm going to Brenham with Dad and Mama racist it's Grandpa Davis' birthday. We'll be back in the afternoon. Brian and I are drawing closer to each other and are learning to be gentler with our words. When we do err in our words or actions towards each other, we're learning to quickly make it right. We're getting past some of our selfishness.

January 23, 2000

I lost our precious baby. I began bleeding on Friday and it got worse. Today I bled terribly, losing big clots. It was rough to go through that, but we feel the Lord carrying is through.

Monday, January 24, 2000

This morning I saw Dr. Love. He was sorry to hear of the loss and confirmed to us that, yes, it was indeed a baby, something that the ER Doctor had told us was not the case when we went in on Saturday. The ER dr. said that the sack was empty and that there probably was never a baby there. I called Nancy McCasslin on Sunday for some advise and told her what the doctor has said and she also confirmed that there had to have been a baby there, but that it just didn't make it very long.
This evening we had a little service and gave our little ones back to God. Brian brought home a floral arrangement with a card attached that said "In loving memory of Baby Wells, January 23, 2000". Brian said some words and we shared our thoughts about this baby that we never knew. He then read some of Psalm 139 and we sang It Is Well With My Soul, and prayed and wept. We both cried so much! We then went for a walk up and down the long driveway and we had out margaret to bed. We shared our thoughts and the deepest things of our hearts. I've grown so close to Brian over these past several days. We've been through a lot since Friday. He has shown so much love and tender care for me, cleaning up my blood from all over, holding me when the tears began to fall, cleaning the house for me, and keeping up with Margaret. He's such a blessing!

Tuesday, Janaury 25, 2000

Neither Brian nor I thought we'd be hit so hard by the lost of a baby at this early stage of its life as we'd still not grown attached to it. But I guess we had. This evening we went on a date and it was good to have time to ourselves.we didn't have much to say. I guess we said everything yesterday and the day before. I felt cranky and irritable and we continually fighting an urge to complain.
I bought a charm for my charm bracelet for the baby. It's a heart and inside is a charm of a mother holding a baby. We're going to have "baby 1-23-00" engraved on the back.

Wednesday, January 26, 2000

I was so emotional today. I cried so much! I longed to be in Brian's arms because only he knew what I was feeling (besides the Lord, of course), and could understand my tears. We've grown very close. I asked him if we could just stay at home and not go to church. So we did. We had a good evening together. We cried some and laughed a little, too.

 So reads a portion of my journal. I've read through those pages several times in the last day or so and cry every time. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's a longing for the baby we never knew, the one who would've turned 16 this past August. When I picture it, it's always a boy, but we don't know for sure. Or maybe I cry out of pity for myself. I was so young. It had taken nearly a year to get pregnant with Margaret and then she was born a month early. Nine months later I was losing my second child. i was barely 24. I hadn't experienced five super easy conceptions and pregnancies, some "planned" but most of them not. We wondered if Margaret would be our only child. I wondered if I had permanently damaged my body from years of an eating disorder. Or maybe I cry for the beautiful simplicity but depth of faith that I had, something that's lacking in my life now. I thank God that I came across that journal. after I read to Brian last night we sat at the picnic table near the cul de sac and held each other and cried. He prayed for us and we thanked God for our children. Life is beautiful.

The latest

Once again I"m determined to start blogging again. So much to catch up on. I'll do my best. Let me start with the kids. Margaret is a senior now! She is fabulously juggling waiting tables at a neighborhood restaurant, taking mostly advanced classes at school, and running cross country. I think she's finally learning to enjoy school, and has been participating more in the social life at VHS. This year she holds a solid position on cross country and is running her best times yet. She is a joy to be around. She is also so helpful! I don't know where I'd be without her! Samuel is in his sophomore year. He is also running cross country and is Vandegrift's fastest runner. He trains with a local elite runner, David Fuentes. Samuel has improved so much in his ability to juggle all of his classwork and homework, as well as keep up his training. He's also taken up an interest in guitar and is actually quite good. He is quickly able to pick out songs he hears on the radio. William is in 8th grade. He has grown so much since last year. He's not the same kids who spent much time in the principal's office the last year. He's determined to do well both academically and athletically. He's playing football and ( according to him) is one of the best players. We have yet to see him play, but their first scrimmage is Tuesday. John is in 6th grade now. He seems to much prefer middle school to elementary, but I miss that he doesn't come home as early. I enjoyed having a little time with him while the others were still at school. He's in the Quest program for gifted students. We thought he would be our one band student, but at the last minute he chose to do art & theater arts instead. He shows great interest in architecture and is fascinated by sky scraper. He's already decided he would like to be an architect. Over the summer he did a little work up at Brian's office, even going out on job sites with the architects. He's a voracious reader and it's hard to pull him away from his books. He's still my faithful babysitter and is so good with the girls. Hazel is nearly five years old. She is dreamy and imaginative. She loves to be beautiful and changes clothes several times a day. I'm homeschooling her using Horizon's kindergarten curriculum and also making up some parts on my own. She just eats up the special attention and is already attempting to read all the words she sees. Olive sits in on our little lessons until she loses interest and then goes off to play with ponies or princesses. We're memorizing The Sermon on the Mount for our scripture memory, and are currently reading the original Winnie the Pooh by A.A.Milne for our read a loud. We are incorporating a few Charlotte Mason ideas, doing nature walks and creating nature journals. Id' like to add art to our lessons eventually. Olive is a funny little girl. She's much different from Hazel, so feisty and witty. She teases Hazel quite a bit. I don't want her to grow up. I'd be happy for her to stay a chubby, curly haired cutie forever. Brian and I are just picking up our marathon training, and I'm feeling it. We run together almost every day. The days we don't run I make up the distance in walking. I got a Fitbit this year and am pretty addicted to tracking my steps. I aim at 30K a day, which is around 16 or so miles. When I hit that goal for many days in a week I'm just beat! We're registered for the Houston and Austin marathons again. I'd love to get under 3:45 in either, a goal I've been chasing for a couple of years now. That would qualify me to run the Boston Marathon, something on my bucket list. I guess that's all the updating I can do today. We were at a Vandegrift football game late last night and then had to get up at 4 am. for Margaret and Samuel's cross country meet, and you know what? I'm so very tired. Gonna try to slip off for a nap before I need to fix dinner, and before the Longhorns play tonight. Samuel is going to the game with some buddies, and John is going with Thomas and Tommy. Maybe someone will ask me to the game sometime. =)

Today is the last day of a long string of uninterrupted days with Brian and the kids. I really do love the beauty of seasons and patterns in this life. The two weeks the kids have off and the one week Brian gets off at this time of year is so special. So on the one hand I'm very sad to see our vacation time end, but on the other hand I'm a person who loves order and routine, so I'm looking forward to sending my people back out and myself having reign and rule over this house again. 

A few things I'm looking forward to this year:

- finishing up the remodel. It's been a long year of people in and out!

- running the Houston marathon in two weeks and the Austin in six. 

- cheering on William and Samuel in track. Margaret is sitting out this season. 

- reading through the Bible afresh. 

- finishing out the school year well. this is our last year to have an elementary student for a couple of years. that tugs at my heart a bit. as does the fact that Margaret will be a senior next year. please slow down!

I'm excited to see what the Lord has for us this year! Last year was nothing like we imagined it would be, and that's ok! 

2015.

1. What did you do in 2015 that you'd never done before? ran a sub-4 hour marathon, visited NYC, had plastic surgery, earned silver elite status with Marriott hotels, volunteered for disaster cleanup after the May floods.

 2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I resolved to read through the Bible, which I did fairly well at. Probably didn't get through all of it though. I resolved to read 50 books. I think I read maybe 30. I resolved to run a marathon: check. I resolved to be more hospitable and host more people in our home. That got completely derailed because our house was torn up for most of the year or we were living in a hotel. I do plan to make some resolutions this year. Probably similar to last year's. 

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? no one very close. a few friends.

 4. Did anyone close to you die? no. we were blessed. 

5. What countries did you visit? none. 

6. What would you like to have in 2016 that you lacked in 2015? More time with my older kids. They're growing up so fast! 

7. What date from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? March 6, the day we noticed a leak in our kitchen. That was the beginning of #houseremodel2015 and all the adventures associated with that.

 8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Designing our house remodel and ordering all the pieces myself. Also getting my best time ever in a marathon. 

 
9. What was your biggest failure? not loving people enough. getting impatient and saying hurtful things to my children, husband. 

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? a UTI, which was horrible for a few days, but that was it. 

11. What was the best thing you bought? I could say all the new things for our house, but I'm gonna say my ipsy subscription. I love it!

 
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? brian. he is as patient as the day is long. the best lover, friend, dad, son, employee... 

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? terrorists 14. Where did most of your money go? food, house, church, cars, and the many screen repairs.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? My bff getting pregnant at 40! an answered prayer and dream come true. 

 16. What song will always remind you of 2015? Adele's Hello. She was in New York when we were there and margaret and I went to NBC studios to try to see her perform on the Today Show.

 
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: happier or sadder? happier. Olive is past the crawling stage and almost porty trained, and things like that do bring happiness. our house is almost completely remodeled, and though superficial, that, too, brings joy. I have much to be thankful for and each year I grow more content and comfortable with who God made me. I trust His sovereignty like never before. my times are in His hands.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? voluntter to help others - that brings such joy to my heart. read to the little girls. read to myself. paint.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? judge others' motives, mess wit my hair, over indulge, nag my children and husband.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
after spending a long weekend before Christmas with my mom and stepdad, we hosted Christmas Eve at our house, attended the Christmas Eve service at church, then had Christmas morning at home with the kids. We went to my dad's for a late Christmas Day lunch. A couple of days after Christmas we went down to my inlaws for a couple of days.

 21. How did you spend New Years?
I went to the doctor to get antibiotics, cleaned house, went to Ben and Gaia's wedding, then to a NYE party at my friend, Brittani's house.

22. What was your favorite tv program? probably Fixer Upper. I watched it quite a bit over the summer while we were in a hotel. I don't necessarily care for their style, I just love watching them interact. I also watched a lot of Flip or Flop. Tarek and Christina used to annoy the heck out of me, but then I kind of grew to love them. Oh, and Rehab Addict.

 
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? no. 

 24. What was the best book you read? Im reading A Tree Grows in Brroklyn again right now. One of my favorites.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? hmmm. No one person or group stands out. I fell in love with Coldplay again. And listened to the Beetles a whole bunch thanks to my two oldest who a huge fans. 

 
26. What did you want and got? I guess a totally remodeled house, though I would be have said it was something I was wanting as it came totally unexpected. I've always wanted to see New York City, and I got my wish. That was fun! 

 
27. What was your favorite film of this year? I didnt see a single one. brian tells me I'd like the new Star Wars movie even though I'm so not a sci-fi person.

 28. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? 40! Can't recall what I did during the day, but Brian and I went to dinner at the Oasis with Tasha and Marcel. and I dropped my new iPhone on the driveway when we got home. 😭
29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Talking with the Lord more. 

 
30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2015? Cut off jeans and t shirts, lots of Anthropologie duds (found at the thrift store!), faded our Converse, cowboy boots, lots of jeans. I guess I'm pretty casual. 

 31. What kept you sane? exercise. 

 
32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? not really sure. 

 33. What political issue stirred you the most? abortion. 

 
34. Who did you miss? having my neighbor, Lisa, move from across the street to a quarter mile up the street. I didn't realize how much I'd miss seeing her every day!

 
35. Who was the best new person you met? my new friends, Brittani and Irina from my neighborhood.

 36. Tell us some valuable life lessons you learned in 2015. Patience, my child. Be still and know that I am God.

Happy New Year!

Anniversary 2014

http://youtu.be/AfrsNl1EHOs

We survived the first week of the 2014-2015 school year. Once Margaret got all her classes straightened out she's decided this is going to be a fabulous year. She taking cross country again, soccer, pre-AP English, pre-AP chemistry, geometry, Spanish, painting II, and pre-AP world history. It's a challenging course load, but she seems committed to making it happen. She is thrilled to be back working out with her cross country friends. 

Samuel had some hiccups with his schedule and ended up in two art classes he had already taken instead of first year Spanish. Unable to switch, he's just making the best if it and enjoying having an easy class. Otherwise, he's taking pre-AP English, 8th grade math (pre algebra?), life science, US history, and of course the two art classes: art & theater arts. He also has two periods of athletics each day. He'll be playing 8th grade football this year. The Canyon Ridge Eagles have high hopes as they won district as 7th graders last year. Every afternoon he spends nearly two hours working out with his team. 

William is so excited to be at the middle school this year! He's taking pre-AP English, science, world history, PACE math, and art. He and Samuel have enjoyed walking to school together each morning this week. William's bike has been in the shop, and once it gets back to us, they'll ride together. William is also playing Pop Warner football for the Four Points Vipers. This is a first for him, and he's loving it. His team practices at the middle school right after Samuel's team finishes up. 

John is the only one at the elementary this year. He's had a bit of a rough week, but it usually takes a little time for him to adjust to something new. He'll probably fare much better next week. His big news is that he gets to be in a portable this year! :) Last spring John tested into the QUEST program for gifted learners, so he'll begin working with that group starting next week.

I have enjoyed my week at home with the little girls. Hazel talks my ear off and has a long list of task a for me to do. Olive has started doing new tricks, dragging herself across the room, moving (only backwards) in her walker, and feeding herself. She seems very curious and wants to try to grab everything she can. She jabbers and coos in her alto voice and Hazel often interprets what she says, "Olive said 'yes, sir!'." These girls are such a delight to spend my days with!

This week Hazel and I planted our little vegetable garden. We went to the library one day, thrifting, to see Brian at his office, and to the grocery store multiple times. We made Popsicle stick people, read so many books, cleaned house and folded mountains of laundry, ran and walked many miles with the double jogger, played at the park at sunset twice, painted and other crafty endeavors, and made cookies twice. 

Brian and I are training for an October marathon. We don't intend to train too much for it as we must want to finish it and not set any time goals. We are also signed up for the Austin. Marathon in February which we both hope to run well in. We've enjoyed getting out for many if our runs together. Last Sunday morning we did a ten miler before church. This weekend we have an eleven miler. 

Brian has been really busy at work. He was promoted to the supervisor of design over the architecture and engineering departments, though I'm not sure what his official title is. He hasn't been able to step into this role fully as he's still wrapping up that big Waller Creek Tunnel project downtown. 

I guess that's all for now. I have so many partially written blog posts that I've never posted over the year, so I'm just going to post this one without proofing it. If I wait too long it'll never get posted. 

Sunday morning, April 13, 2014

I'm going to try to get a few words down before I need to sart getting ready for church.

The last two weeks have been somewhat crazy. Samuel joined a basketball club team and Margaret wrapped up track season at the district finals. There was STAAR testing for three of the four kids, and projects due. Brian had some shake up at work with one if his valuable co-workers giving his two week notice, as well as two of the principals retiring. These two events opened unexpected opportunity for him to take on new leadership. Then there's the three of us girls who stay home. Life isn't what you'd call busy for us. Physically exhausting, maybe, but not necessarily busy. From 5 am. To 10 pm I'm feeding, changing diapers, bathing, singing to, reading to, pushing and pulling the two little ones. At the end of the day I fall into bed sore, but fulfilled. 

Olive is nearly two months old. She now feels like family and not a stranger. Not gonna lie, she's a really fussy baby. Nothing puts me on edge faster than a crying baby, so I spend her waking hours trying to pacify her. She's not much of a smiler. We've only got a handful of grins out of her. Mostly she seems really concerned about what's going on in her tummy and does a lot of frowning. Even so, she's such a sweet thing and I just stare at her in wonder that God gave us another child, and this one just as unique and precious as the other five.

Yesterday we sold my old Ford Ranger. I've had it since 1996, longer than I've had Brian. My great grandmother promised all her kids a new car when they graduated high school. She didn't count homeschool as true schooling, and held off giving my sister and I cars until we were older (Thomas attended public high school, so he received his upon graduation.). I got mine for my 20th birthday. 

It'll be sad the day the new owner comes and drives it away. We're hoping to find Brian a good commuter car that will hold more kids, get good gas mileage, and last us awhile.

That's all the news for now. Have a blessed Holy Week! 

He is risen!