there's our Scandinavian baby. she's so fair and blonde/blue eyed. funny that two dark brown haired/brown eyed people came up with her. ah, we sure do love her. she's been talking like crazy lately. i shot a video of her, trying to catch the chatter box in action. of course she didn't perform for the camera. maybe another time. she's scooting around in her walker and picking up things and just really coming into herself. it's really cute how when we're in the car and everyone is talking at once, she starts squealing and jabbering away, too, offering her two cents. it makes everyone laugh.

today she's four months old.

yesterday was just about the hardest school day ever. i was ready to quit the homeschooling thing for good. on top of it, i was having a really bad colitis day. i felt awfully distracted, which i'm sure contributed to the kids' behavior struggles. i just kind of had to walk away from it all and decide to make a fresh start the next day. which is what i did. i started this day crying out to God for His help, something i'd been neglecting lately. i got out and spent some time in prayer and thoughts early this morning and i think it made a big difference.

i've never pretended to have a conviction about homeschooling. i kind of wish i did, because it would make it way easier to deal with the day to day frustrations. i'm committed to homeschooling as long as we have to, though it's not my first choice.  but as long as we're doing it, i'll continue to give 100%. i'm just getting really worn down doing so.

this post has been stretched out over a couple of days because i haven't had time to complete it in one sitting. not sure if it makes much sense to the reader. oh well. yesterday was another very difficult day. i was literally sick from feeling so stressed out. thankfully yesterday was also date night, so i had that to look forward to at the end of the tunnel. Brian and Hazel and i went to El Chile, then walked around the French Place neighborhood, then shared a local brew at Thunderbird before heading home.

per my friend Heather's recommendation, i checked out that book about having a new kid by friday. i'm hoping it will help me out. i might read it to Brian every night before we go to bed. how's that to kindle the romance?=)

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.  ~Peter De Vries